In first setting up this site, I noticed quickly that the word “shadow” has appeared quite often.
- The name of my 1st band, “5 O’Clock Shadow”. (I can take no credit for this name.)
- My band with buddy Ross, “T.R. Roland & The Shadows”. (An homage to the former.)
- One of my songs, entitled “Shadow”. (About a faceless entity that you cannot escape.)
- Another song of mine, “Shadow Music”. (Unofficial “5 O’Clock Shadow” theme song.)
As Jerry Seinfeld might say, “what’s the deal with this guy and his obsession with shadows?”
To some, a shadow can be represented as a dark or ominous thing…pursuing you against your will. (Sounds like a great episode of The Twilight Zone to me…) But to me, “shadow” represents a secret or hidden part of you that is always there. Perhaps the real you, a protector of sorts, or who you aspire to be.
I have always been a somewhat reserved man. Not “shy” in the true sense…engaging in any conversation directed toward me. But in a large group, I am often a wall-flower. Quietly observing, not taking the lead, patiently waiting my turn.
Because of that, I often think that people don’t really get to know who I actually -am-, just who they perceive me to the be. This dichotomy is fascinating to me…and always has been. Even back in school, I imagined the Matt I wanted to be vs. the Matt people saw. Thus the “shadow” thing was born.
In the time with my dearest friends in our band, sharing music and laughter on a weekly basis, I think they most closely saw who I was in my youth. And their unconditional acceptance was a blessing. Thus there’s a lot of “shadow” in my music because it was in my times with the band that it was most set free.
One of the lines I had the pleasure to sing in “Play It Again” perfectly sums this up:
“In the mirror, in the dark, everybody’s got that spark. It may glimmer, it may glow. Turn it on and let it grow.”
One of the purposes of this web site was to give me an escape…a tiny little personal look into my life. Mostly as a showcase of my music, with some tech consulting on the side. This is the -real- me.